AshehhDee

17th August 2012

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There isn’t a day that goes by where I don’t, at some point, think of you. Or, some kind of memory we once shared. It’s like I look at a certain thing, hear a certain song or even eat a certain food, and suddenly I am reminded of you, the time we shared, the conversations we had, and the best friend you used to be. I know I ruined it and I’m sorry. I’m sorry because I miss you so much yet you don’t seem to at all. Because I still hesitate at the sounds of your voice, even hearing your name, but you don’t even blink at the sound of mine. Because I’m trying my hardest to let things go back to normal yet you don’t even bother to put in the effort to make things work. I’m sorry because once again, I’m crying over you while you’re probably having the time of your life with her.

17th August 2012

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Don’t be that girl. That girl who goes back continuously and thinks that every time will be different. I understand you miss him, and its easier to breathe with him around. But isn’t easier to smile when he’s not breaking up with you, or getting mad at you for nothing? You don’t deserve to be the backup. That person he drops and picks up whenever he feels like. Don’t be that girl. That girl who thinks that each time he comes around he means what he says and won’t leave again, everyone knows he will. And you end up looking like a fool in the end.. Again. I get that you’re happier when he is texting you and cuddling with you. But aren’t you happier when you aren’t crying on your floor because he hasn’t said a word to you all day? No one can tell you who to be. But don’t be that girl. You’re smarter than that girl. Stronger than that girl. And worth a hell of a lot more than that girl.

Don’t worry. He’ll miss you. You’re the best he could get and he blew it. Don’t let him make you think for one second that it was your fault. It’s not. He screwed up, and you did absolutley nothing wrong. You gave him your heart and you trusted him to keep it and protect it, but he couldn’t. And honestly he’s not mature enough. He’s not smart enough. If he was smart, he would have cared for you with every fiber of his being and been with you in every spare second he could, but he didn’t and now he’s gone. But don’t you cry, Sweetie.Don’t call him telling him you miss him. Don’t IM him, don’t message him, don’t comment him, and don’t talk to him in the hallways, just pretend like you don’t care, because, well, you don’t. And don’t be surprised when he comes crawling back saying he made a mistake, and if you want to, go with him again, but make him work for you. Don’t be his doormat. Don’t let him the first time he rings the bell, make him come back every day until you trust him enough. If he doesn’t come back after a couple of tries, just let him go, but if he comes back every day, then he’s worth it, trust me. He’s worth it. but this one sadly is not.